As some of my readers may have noticed, I haven’t been posting everyday like I had been doing earlier in the year. I had every intention of writing for 365 days straight, but things just didn’t work out that way.
Starting this blog wasn’t a New Year’s resolution of mine. It was born out of a very real need for communication in my heart language. When you go from one culture where you can fully express yourself and be understood, to a different culture where those things don’t come as easily or naturally, I think it is important to find some way to “download” your thoughts. Otherwise, you start to go a little stir crazy.
From the beginning, this blog has been about developing a greater zeal for knowing and loving Jesus Christ. While blogging has truly helped me to organize and weigh all the thoughts I have floating around in my head, it has, first and foremost, helped me to become closer to my Savior.
The reason I stopped writing for the past couple of months wasn’t because I stopped trying to grow in my relationship with Christ. Rather, I stopped writing because I have been growing in my relationship with Christ. The past few months have been some of the most difficult spiritually on record. Recently, I have warred with doubt, fear, and insecurity, sometimes all at once. The enemy has been gunning for me, so to speak. But now, through spending more secret time alone with God, I am learning how to confront these things head on with His Word.
For much of my life, I have cowered from confrontation out of fear of losing someone or something I hold dear. Many times I have asked God to take the fear away without much avail. I realize now that I should instead pray for more love, for it is perfect love that casts out fear (1 John 4:18).
With that being said, I hope to begin writing more regularly again. In general, I pray that God would fill me with more joy, victory, hope, and love as I follow Christ. For me, this is a season of catching foxes. These are the things that seek to steal my joy and disrupt my intimacy with God.
Perhaps, it’s time for you to catch those little foxes too.
Catch the foxes for us,
the little foxes
that spoil the vineyards,
for our vineyards are in blossom.
Song of Songs 2:15